


wherever you're goin', I'm goin' that way (the same, the same...)

by flowers4flowers



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, just a headsup this takes place 5-6 years before the events of the force awakens, many thanks to Michael Giacchino and Frank Ocean for providing the soundtrack to this fic, no beta readers we self-edit like men, tags to be added as fic continues, the D'Qar base is relatively new, which is why the Big Names of Force Awakens aren't really present
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-12
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-05-21 06:28:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14910101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowers4flowers/pseuds/flowers4flowers
Summary: Despite the fact that she's in the middle of the canteen working, she's not distracted. A few year cycles in the Resistance is enough to make the task of decoding something she can accomplish anywhere on base. In the middle of the hangar, keeping Liz company as she does repairs on her X-Wing? No problem. Decoding while taking a stroll through the jungles of D’Qar? A, literal, walk in the park. This ability to work wherever she is is one of the key reasons why the hardest decoding work comes to Michelle. Nothing can throw her off her game.“Do you think if I pull off that really complex turn tomorrow in training Liz will notice?”Well, there's one thing that can throw Michelle off her game.Lieutenant Peter Parker, formerly of Dulathia, currently of D’Qar, and perpetually a pain in her ass.-Or: a Star Wars au





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note: I've aged everyone up in this story to the age their respective actor is. So no, no fifteen year old is flying an X-Wing. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Michelle Jones will be the first to admit that, while she loves the intellectual challenge of decoding work, she’s not the biggest fan of doing this work in the middle of the canteen. The information she's decoding is on a datastick that Liz had brought back from her reconnaissance mission in the Mid Rim, and the information (hopefully) stored on it is important enough that Michelle is using one hand to spoon her food into her mouth, and the other hand is flying across a sheet of flimsi as she works through the jumbled jargon on the datastick. Whoever had written the coding had used at least five different languages, mixed up the dialects on two of them, and had thrown in some binary just for shits and giggles. The dialects are more tricky, because Michelle is more familiar with the standardized version, and these seemed more localized to different areas of their respective planets. But it's good, challenging work, and Michelle finds some enjoyment in making her way through the information.

Despite the fact that she's in the middle of the canteen working, she's not distracted. A few year cycles in the Resistance is enough to make the task of decoding something she can accomplish anywhere on base. In the middle of the hangar, keeping Liz company as she does repairs on her X-Wing? No problem. Decoding while taking a stroll through the jungles of D’Qar? A, literal, walk in the park. This ability to work wherever she is is one of the key reasons why the hardest decoding work comes to Michelle. Nothing can throw her off her game.

“Do you think if I pull off that really complex turn tomorrow in training Liz will notice?”

Well, there's one thing that can throw Michelle off her game. 

Lieutenant Peter Parker, formerly of Dulathia, currently of D’Qar, and perpetually a pain in her ass. 

It’s not that he's not talented, because he is. He's one of the best pilots in Green Squadron, and has an easy enough handle with languages to make him a valuable asset on missions. Not to mention the fact that he and Leeds have taken the Green Squadron's production to new heights with their mechanical skills. Leeds isn't a pilot, but is extremely helpful on the ground, and knows his way around astromechs.

So no, it isn’t the fact that Parker’s becoming a golden boy right before her eyes. And it isn’t the fact that he excels at essentially everything he lays a hand on. 

It's the fact that he never, ever seems to notice anyone else except Liz. And he never stops talking about her.

“Peter, if you do that she’ll totally notice you! That’d make you one of the coolest pilots in the squadron!”

“Yeah!" He pauses for one rare moment of silence. "But we should probably stop whispering about her before it gets creepy.”

“Too late.” Their heads jerk over in her direction, and it’s clear that they’re just now noticing that she’s sitting right down the table from them. Not like she’s been sitting at the table for an hour, pretty much same as them. For two geniuses, they sure manage to have very narrow fields of focus.

“You guys are losers.” 

Because seriously, how does Parker manage, in the middle of a war, to always circle his mind back to someone he’s never actually said more than ten sentences to? It’s not like Liz isn’t personable, the complete opposite actually. Michelle’s first day on base had seen Liz walk straight up to her and take her right under her wing. Liz is so magnetic it’s a wonder that every piece of metal doesn’t fly towards her when she walks into a room-Parker’s inability to converse with her is his own fault. 

“Well then why do you sit with us?” Leeds’ confusion is palpable from all the way down the table.

Michelle is mature enough to admit that _she_ is _not_ the most personable person in the world, which might explain how she manages to snag a wide berth wherever she sits in the canteen. But Liz had simply taken that attitude with a smile, and Michelle counts her as her closest friend. 

“Because I don’t have any friends.” 

And so that’s a big ol’ lie.

But Leeds and Parker don’t need to know that. After that they leave her alone, and she turns back to her work. When they get up and leave she’s still there, still working her way through the complex information. They don’t say goodbye, and she doesn’t acknowledge them as they walk past. 

When Liz shows up she doesn’t do what Leeds and Parker did, sitting several feet away from her like Michelle’s got a physical barrier around her. Liz plops her tray down right across from Michelle, and they sit in companionable silence as Michelle finishes her work, and Liz flips through a report on her datapad. Michelle forwards her work to her super, scanning the flimsi sheets with her portable scanner and using her datapad to send the copies on. He’s quick to respond with a sincere thank you, and a compliment on the quality of her translation. 

She allows herself a small smile, and looks up to find Liz looking at her with an expectant expression. Michelle doesn’t mind telling her, because although her day-to-day is relatively mundane, Liz listens to it all with genuine interest.

It’s the best part of Michelle’s day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't know if portable scanners are a thing, but I say they are so ha! Take that Wookiepedia!
> 
> Hope you've enjoyed the first chapter! As always, comments are very much appreciated :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We get some more information on the state of the Resistance, and Flash makes an appearance. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Liz is up to her elbows in engine, looking at something Michelle can’t quite remember the name of. Michelle prides herself on her linguistic skills, and her ability to crack the hardest of codes. Ships, though? Completely useless. But she likes keeping Liz company, and right now she’s sketching on the side of Liz’s X-Wing _The Padmé_. Her sketches are all over the sides of _Padmé_ , so now she’s adding onto the originals so to avoid drawing over them. Her Gigoran is sprouting some horns, and she thinks about painting it a princely purple. The workflow has been slow today, so she has enough time to hang about the hangar with Liz and scrawl on her X-Wing.

It actually was Michelle’s idea to name the ship, which isn’t entirely common in the fleet if the ship isn’t a frigate or battleship. But it was Liz’s idea to name it after the late, great Padmé Amidala, and thus _The Padmé_ graces the side of the ship in Naboo. Michelle had painted it in a vivid rose color, and she thinks about touching it up again before her meeting with Harrington in two hours.

It’s shaping up to be a pretty good day.

“Hello ladies.”

Spoke too soon. Eugene “Flash” Thompson is sauntering over to them, his shades pushed back into his hair in a bad imitation of Dameron. Not that Eugene will ever admit how much he wants to be Dameron, it’s just obvious in every word that comes out of his mouth. 

“Hello.” Michelle pauses for dramatic effect. “Eugene.” She hears Liz snort from where she’s dangling into the engine compartment of her ship.

An irritated look ghosts over his face before he schools it back into a lazily arrogant smirk, but Michelle feels the rush of victory at getting under his skin so easily. She aims a smirk right back at him.

“Anything I can help you with?”

Her smirk slides away. “Nope.”

“You sure?”

“Wouldn’t have said ‘nope’ if I didn’t mean it.”

He seems taken aback, but his recovery time is somewhat decent. He moves past Michelle now that he knows he won’t get an answer he wants from her, and he leans against the side of the ship. 

And in the process smudges the horns of her Gigoran.

Great, just _great_.

He stares for a few beats at Liz, who’s pulled herself up and out of the engine compartment over the course of his and Michelle’s exchange. He aims for confident ace-pilot, but from Michelle’s point of view he just looks like a puffed-up kid. He’s _their age_ , for kriff’s sake. All this posturing doesn’t help him look older and more experienced-it just makes him look arrogant. 

Maybe she’s a bit biased because Eugene had sauntered onto the base like he owned it, and the fact that he has enough money in his family to get the gear he wants when he wants it. Everyone else has to wait for parts and gear, and most of the supplies are second hand because their slowly growing resistance is just that- _slowly_ growing. That’s why their base isn’t that full with personel, the Resistance in its current form is spread all over the galaxy. Right now there’s only four X-Wing squadrons on the entire base, and the only mechanics present are the ones needed by their respective squadrons. Michelle’s not sure about the other departments, but she knows she is one of six people Harrington has to work with. 

So to say they’re stretched thin is not an exaggeration, their prospective ‘wealth’ disappearing as soon as it appears in order to get the supplies and resources needed to keep a resistance like this on its feet. Michelle knows Eugene’s parents donate in secret, but in spite of that she can guarantee there’s not a humble bone in his body.

Yet she can’t dislike him completely, because even with all that money and arrogance he still actively puts himself in danger for the greater good. He doesn’t have to, but he does, and that’s something.

So she can’t dislike him too much.

Even if he smudges her drawings and doesn’t apologize.

She looks up to see Liz giving Eugene a very patient, yet somewhat weary look as he launches into the trials and tribulations of his test run today. Eugene’s in Crimson squadron, so Michelle’s less familiar with the work he does on base. She knows Cobalt and Green fairly well because Liz is in Cobalt, and Green docks their ships in the same hangar as Cobalt. Eugene’s Crimson squadron docks clear across base, so today seems to be the day he puts in the effort to walk all the way over and bother them. 

Luckily, it seems like he only really wants to talk to Liz. Michelle tunes out the conversation and stares at where he’s smudging her art, and contemplates how much damage will have been done before he moves away from her Gigoran. 

She snaps out of her head when a sharp sound blares too close for comfort, and has to restrain herself from hitting the ground as fast as possible. As she’s slowly working the tenseness out of her shoulders she realizes that the noise that startled her is Liz’s astromech making a beeline for Eugene in a bold attempt to protect Liz from an ‘encroaching stranger’.

R4 knows perfectly well who Eugene is, but as Liz likes to point out to Michelle: “They’re just about as friendly as you are, only half the time people don’t know that they’re being insulted’. 

R4 butts itself into one of Eugene’s legs, and Eugene lets out a very undignified yelp and scrambles up the nearby ladder as R4 reels back and tries to take out his other leg. R4 settles for ramming the bottom of the ladder, in an apparent attempt to knock him off of it so that they can wreak vengeance on the stranger that threatens Liz.

‘Threatens’ being a bit of a stretch, as Michelle’s sure that all Eugene's attempting to do is ask Liz out. 

Liz just shakes her head and ducks back into the engine compartment, as though her astromech attacking a fellow pilot is a totally normal thing that occurs every day. Maybe it is.

Eugene meets her eyes in a silent call for help, but she just gives him a serene smile before going back to her drawing. She takes a spare rag and cleans the smudges he’s left behind, all the while ignoring his harshly whispered “ _Michelle, help me._ ” She’ll let him squirm for a bit, take some of the wind out of his sails. 

She gets rid of the smudges and finalizes the edges on her horns, and contemplates if she wants to color them in or not. Michelle spares a quick look at her chrono and sees that she’s still got plenty of time, and decides to go for it. She asks Liz what color she should use, and hears a muffled “green” come out of the engine. Michelle bangs the side of the compartment in acknowledgement, and crosses the floor to where she’s left her paintsticks. She makes out Eugene's heavy breathing from his perch atop the ladder, and R4’s unceasing banging at the bottom of the ladder.

Her day’s looking up, and she hasn’t even had her meeting with Harrington yet.

She hears them before she sees them, Parker and Leeds somehow having gone this far in life without learning the value of an “inside voice”. 

She ignores them in favor of searching for her green paintstick, and a small part of her hopes they just walk past and don’t comment on the weirdness occurring behind her. Michelle can’t quite out a finger on just _why_ Parker annoys her so much, but the fact that he does is enough to make her actively avoid his company. Maybe today she’ll get lucky.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” Leeds asks. The squeak of their boots on the floor of the hangar indicates that they’ve both come to an abrupt stop. Maybe if she pretends she doesn’t hear them they’ll move on. It’s an act of kindness to Eugene, because then he doesn’t have to explain how he came to be sitting atop a ladder while an astromech actively works to knock him to the ground. 

_See_? Michelle thinks. _I can be friendly_.

“'Sup Penis.” Nevermind. Eugene’s on his own.

“Hey.” Parker pauses. “Eugene.”

Okay, that’s kind of funny, but that’s her thing.

“What do you losers want,” she asks, not turning around. 

“Uh.” Parker, eloquent as always. “Just wanted to see why Eugene-” and there’s a stress on his name, she can hear it, “-is sitting on Liz’s ship.” She can practically _hear_ his head tilt. “And why R4 seems to be acting out a personal vendetta against him.”

“I don’t see why that’s any of your business Parker.” Eugene’s being bold, acting like the position he's currently in is all of his own making. There’s something commendable in that. 

She stops listening, the two of them most likely about to launch into a machismo contest in order to prove something that doesn’t need to be proven. Most of the pilots she’s met are like that-reckless and cocky, but insecure enough that they feel the need to prove themselves in every conversation, in every action.

But Parker surprises her. Michelle tells herself she’s tuned them out, but she hears Parker when he goes “huh.”

There’s a pause, and then Parker says, “fair point.” Then he and Leeds walk towards the exit. 

They just walk away. 

_What_.

She’s caught off guard by that, and apparently so is Eugene. She hears him spluttering, and Liz’s laughter echoes from inside the engine compartment. R4 also trills in amusement, their characteristic whir rising and falling in the same manner as the laugh of a humanoid.

Michelle does Eugene a favor by holding back her snort, but she gives him a raised eyebrow when she turns around to find him looking at her in open-mouthed, humbled shock. It’s a beautiful sight.

“Close your mouth, Eugene. You’ll catch bugs.” His mouth claps shut with an audible click. 

_See_. Michelle smirks. _I can be friendly_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter-I wanted to flesh out the Resistance a bit more, and give some situational context to the relative state of action in Michelle's life. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading! As always, comments are very much appreciated :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Michelle have an important conversation about her work in the Resistance, and Michelle comes to a startling realization. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Michelle thinks next to nothing about Parker over the next few weeks as work floods in following an impromptu insurrection occurring in the next system over. The burgeoning First Order had previously set up a base on an isolated planet, slowly but surely expanding across the small planet’s surface until they had had a tight fist slowly choking all life. The citizenry had taken it upon themselves to overthrow the FO, and in the ensuing retreat the FO had left behind an entire base full of information that hadn't been wiped out of the systems.

General Organa, still masquerading as 'Senator' Organa, had made sure that the information went to the New Republic per protocol. But not before she had the information duplicated and sent to the base, wherein Harrington had had a field day. He still seems giddy about all the information currently flowing through the base, handing out assignments with a spark in his eyes.

Michelle finishes her assigned work a bit early, and decides to swing by his office one more time before heading to the canteen. Harrington's more than willing to give her more work, and Michelle goes to the canteen with flimsi pages stacked nearly to her chin. After she gets her food and settles down in what she now refers to as her 'unofficial official seat', she breezes through the translations like they're nothing. It's all in binary, which means there was no attempt at stupefying potential translators. This clearly shows that the people recording the information had never assumed that one day this information would be lost to them and out in the world. Like they assumed the FO was incapable of losing a battle against angry civilians.

_Ha_.

Michelle gets down to the last few pages, and there she runs into a bit of trouble. Not much, it's just that whoever recorded this particular set of information had not felt the need to use punctuation. It's run on sentence after run on sentence, which makes translating tricky simply because it's harder to get into the flow of the sentence. She pushes away her food to give the pages her full attention, and manages to get into a rhythm. Only pausing every once in awhile to take sips of her tea, once steaming and now quite tepid, she picks up speed. One page done, then a second, and the next thing she knows she's blazing through the work with hardly any difficulties. 

She leans in to closely examine a sentence, her concentration holding firm despite the chaos of the canteen around her.

And then, it happens.

“What are you working on?” The voice carries down the table towards her, and it bursts her concentration bubble. Michelle forcibly makes sure she doesn’t visibly rankle at the intrusion, but Parker’s question has broken her train of thought in the middle of translating a sentence that takes up a full flimsi page. 

Parker’s position as a pain in her ass has not only notched up a few degrees, it’s _this close_ to becoming his permanent designation.

She fights back an irritated sigh, and tries to keep her tone as light and friendly as possible. “What do you mean Parker?” Okay, the irritation she feels still sneaks into the tail end of her question, but Michelle mentally applauds herself for not snapping at him.

“I mean, what do you even do here? I only ever see you either in the hangar or in here, but you’re never holding anything or doing something that shows what you do. I thought I saw you working on something at dinner a few weeks ago, but it just kind of looked like stuff. I saw the flimsi pages, but I figured it was just you sketching, like what you do on Liz’s X-Wing.”

Michelle knows full well that he doesn’t mean it in an insulting way, but it still stings because what she does is important. Yes she’s not flying through the air like him and Liz, and yes she doesn’t carry around tools to do repairs like Leeds, but what she does on the ground is important! 

Leeds also works on the ground, but Michelle figures, _knows_ , that he’d never talk about Leeds’ work the way he just talked about hers. 

He’d never call Leeds’ work _stuff_.

She lets him have it.

“Five languages, two of which had different dialects woven throughout making the language all the more layered. Throw in some binary, and the fact that the information on the datastick made up both sides of fifteen flimsi pages, and you have the _stuff_ I was working on. All in all it amounted to about four hours of work, and you and Leeds only caught about an hour or so. _Stuff_ doesn’t take over four hours, but translation, important translation, does. And as for what I do on base, I work in the decoding department, and unsurprisingly considering we are in the midst of a war, the work typically never stops coming in. Only on the slowest of days do I have more than three hours off, so sometimes I do have to work while eating dinner. _That’s_ what I do.”

She fixes him with a glare, and leans in to emphasize her point. “What I do is not _stuff_.”

She leans back, and waits for his reaction.

Michelle expects anger, or at least irritation from Parker after her little diatribe. For him to storm away, not appreciating her condescension and the fact that she's not taking his incidental dismissal lying down. Many of the people she’s talked back to on base have done that-stomp away calling her names under their breath rather than stay and listen to just how wrong they are. 

But Parker surprises her. There’s genuine contrition on his face as he processes what she’s said, as though he actually feels bad for the way he talked about what she does. And maybe he does feel bad, but Michelle doesn’t know him well enough to trust him.

“Shit.” He pauses, and the crease between his brows gets deeper. “Shit, I’m such an asshole.”

Well, that was unexpected.

“What do you mean Parker?”

“I mean I’m sorry for the way that I talked about what you do, I never meant for it to come across that way." He bobs his head a little, sighs, then continues. "But it did, and I’m glad you called me out on that because I’d rather not be an asshole. What you do isn’t ‘stuff’, and I should have known that.” He gives a self-deprecating laugh as he looks down, scratching at the back of his neck in what seems to be embarrassment. He looks back up at her, his eyes wide. “I didn’t mean to devalue the work you do, but I really stuck my foot in my mouth. Thank you for calling me on my shit.”

He pauses. “And I’m sorry.”

She looks at him for a beat, just long enough for him to squirm slightly. “Apology accepted.” She figures that the conversation has reached its conclusion, that Parker will walk away and they’ll act as though the past few minutes never happened.

But then he surprises her, again. 

“Can you walk me through your translation process? Like, how did you handle the two different dialects if they’re so localized?”

“Probably won’t be of much interest to you.”

Parker shrugs, a small smile playing across his lips. “Try me.”

“Okay then, Parker. But be prepared for an inundation of information, because if you get a headache that’s not on me.”

He huffs out a laugh, before telling her earnestly to “call me Peter, Parker’s way too formal when I’m not on the clock.” He nods in an indication for her to start, and Michelle spends the next hour walking him through the step-by-step process of decoding and translating the information that comes across her lap. She moves to sit across from him, and places the flimsi sheet halfway across the table so that he can see her work in action. She gets through the whole sheet with Parker paying her real, genuine attention as she works through the translation process.

He surprises her yet again by being engaged the entire time, and their conversation only ends when a custodian strolls by in a not-so-subtle attempt at getting them to clear out of the canteen. They take their leave, and continue their conversation down the hall towards their respective bunks.

When they reach the point where the halls branch off the conversation peters out, and they stand there awkwardly for a few seconds. Peter saves the moment by taking the initiative to say goodnight, and gives her a small wave before taking off down the left hall towards his bunk.

Michelle stares after him, somewhat in shock because she realizes as he walks away that the conversation that just occurred is the longest conversation she’s ever had with Parke… Peter. He rounds the corner and goes out of sight, and Michelle jolts as she realizes she’s standing in the hall looking at an empty spot where a boy that simultaneously irritates and surprises her just stood. Shaking her head at herself, she walks to her bunk, and finds Liz still up looking at a small bit of astromech part. 

Liz looks up in surprise, and gives Michelle a Look as they both realize just how late Michelle is in getting back. Liz is usually the one getting in late, with Michelle in bed waiting up for her. It’s weird to have their roles reversed, and Michelle stands frozen in their doorway as though she’s been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. 

Liz’s raised eyebrow doesn’t help.

“So,” Liz’s smile is wicked, her glee barely contained at seeing Michelle act in such an un-Michelle way. “Have fun tonight?”

Michelle tilts her chin up in an attempt to save face. “Yes, I did.” She pauses, having momentarily blanked on what to say next. She recovers quickly enough, but if Liz’s eyebrow could inch any higher, it did just now.

“I had a very good time tonight, but as you can clearly see my lack of coordination-”she slumps in an exaggerated fashion against their wardrobe-”and the bags under my eyes-”she pulls on the skin beneath her eyes-”I am clearly exhausted and thus unfit for questioning.” She walks calmly into the ‘fresher. If ‘walks calmly’ is the same thing as ‘dump your work on your desk, grab your sleep clothes, and hustle as though your heels are on fire’. Luckily, Liz lets it slide. 

Not really, though. Michelle hears her giggling through the door.

It’s as she’s washing up in the sonic, thinking over her conversation with Peter, that she’s caught off guard one last time. Over the course of their entire conversation she found herself surprised by his willingness to learn new things, his genuine interest in what she does. Not that Peter's kindness is a shock, just that it was directed at _her_. He hadn't been faking it in order to get into her good books, raise his chances of getting Liz to notice him. Use Michelle as a way of coming up in conversation, maybe being mentioned in an off-handed remark that Michelle would make in the presence of Liz. Others have tried that technique before, but all gave up after they realized Michelle saw right through the bullshit. 

Peter hadn't done that, which makes him an anomaly.

Still, Michelle had expected him to act a certain way, ask her certain things now that he knows more about her, already knowing who she bunks with. But yet again, Parker pulled the rug out from under her, simply by not acting the way she assumed he would.

Because, at no point in their conversation, had he asked her about Liz. 

Huh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I know anything concrete about the canon timeline? No. Did I write this chapter anyways, working in Leia's Senatorial position and her work with the Resistance? Yes, yes I did.
> 
> I'm not entirely sure on the timeline pre-Force Awakens, but I know that Leia was getting the Resistance together while still working as a Senator. Since this story takes place a few years before FA, I thought I'd take a shot and work that into the plot.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> As always, comments are appreciated, but never required :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A brief update, but I hope you all enjoy the developments throwing Michelle into confused happiness. It's been really fun charting the twists and turns in Michelle's life, and I hope you've enjoyed reading them all!
> 
> Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy it!

The tray that plonks down right in front of her nearly knocks over her caf, and almost makes Michelle jump out of her skin. She didn’t see anyone walking towards her, so when she looks up she’s caught off guard by who she sees.

Ned Leeds is moving to sit down. 

Right across from her.

Not down the table, with several feet between them. Right across from her. At this point Michelle has given up on being thrown by the circumstances developing around her, because between what’s happening right in front of her and what her life has become ever since joining the Resistance, if she lets herself be surprised at every little thing she’ll never have a normal heart rate. 

She makes eye contact with Leeds, and she mentally commends him for how calmly he’s handling her very pointed look. She only knows him through his friendship with Peter, so she doesn’t know what he’s like when he’s on his own. She assumes she’s about to find out.

“‘Sup Leeds?”

He smiles, genuinely smiles, at her. “Not much, I just thought I’d sit with you today.”

“Why? It’s not like I’m here everyday, with you sitting all the way down this table from me.” She gestures towards his usual spot, her confusion palpable. Before he answers, a new thought races through her mind, and she blurts it out before he can speak. “Did Pete-Parker put you up to this? Did he tell you to sit with me?” She knows Leeds is friendly, his reputation precedes him enough that she knows that he’s not sitting with her in order to enact some cruel prank. But the last thing she needs is his pity, his company because he thinks she’s _lonely_.

And it’s not just his pity-it’s Peter’s. She doesn’t want those feelings anywhere near her, especially not sitting **right across from her**.

“No!” Leeds tells her, before he checks himself. “Well, not really. Although you could say…”

“What do you mean, Leeds? What did he say?” What did Peter say that made Leeds feel sorry for poor Michelle Jones? What did he tell him that brought about this sympathy? She doesn’t mean to be harsh, but her reluctance to see the real reason behind Leeds’ company drives her to fix him with her meanest glare, and she leans forward with both her arms crossed on the table. 

She means business, and the timid look Leeds’ gives her shows that she’s communicating that just fine.

And then, a bit of confidence enters his posture, his past hesitancy giving way to his very real friendliness. He leans forward too, and doesn’t turn away from her sharp gaze. “Peter says you’re cool, and I like hanging around cool people. I didn’t have to think too hard about sitting with you.” 

Leeds leans back into his seat, gives her a casual shrug, and then starts to dig into his food. Leeds knows what Michelle thought the reality of the situation was, and he bypasses her anxiety with the plain, simple truth. He's just so casual, so friendly about it all. He's not even visibly upset by her anxiety-laden unpleasantness.

Michelle refuses to be shocked.

Surprised, yes.

Reputations aren’t everything, but it’s a nice surprise to see that Leeds’ lives up to his. Michelle tilts her head and nods, fills the awkward silence when she hums in acknowledgment, and then tucks in to her own food.

She and Leeds eat in silence for several minutes before he asks her how her day was.

Michelle nearly chokes on her Bantha tartare. 

She recovers relatively quickly, and splutters through the various non-events that comprise her day. Leeds’ nods and hums along with what she’s saying, and she doesn’t hesitate to ask him when she’s done giving him the recap. 

It’s… _nice_. It’s _pleasant_. 

It’s what she’s always thought having a friend would be like. She and Liz act like this, but she doesn’t really have any other friends to do stuff like this with. Talking about their day, making idle conversation that still means something because it’s a conversation being had with a friend.

Leeds’ is being her _**friend**_. A warmth spreads through her chest at the realization, and she listens to him with a smile playing across her face. 

Leeds finishes telling her about his day, and they settle back into companionable silence as they go back to eating. She’s mentally drifting when she sees Leeds sit up a bit straighter, a light sparking in his eyes. He waves at someone behind her, and Michelle turns to see Peter making his way towards them. He slides into the seat next to Leeds, and before Michelle is even aware of it, this becomes part of her routine.

She has dinner with them the next day, and then the day after that. A week passes, and she sits with them during dinner each and every night. She keeps track because that’s just the way her brain works-tallying each day, seeing the new milestones pass, and waiting for the other boot to drop. Michelle tries to translate their presence into some rational reason, like maybe a longcon they’re pulling on her, but she admits early on that they’re too genuine to do something like that. It’s just that the rug has been pulled out from under her enough times in her life that she no longer guarantees its presence-it’s always in a state of limbo. Either things are fine, or they’re heading towards being upended. Everything is always in flux for her.

What makes Leeds and Parker different?

Still, after a month passes, and they continue to eat dinner with her every night, Michelle concedes that maybe things are looking up.

And then she stops counting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm alive! Hello! Apologies for the long absence-I went on vacation, and then my manager decided to enact vengeance by scheduling me into inactivity. For the past week the only consistent work I've done is getting the stains out of upholstery. Riveting, as you might suspect.
> 
> But now I'm back with an update! I hope you guys enjoyed it, and I just want you to know I've loved all the comments and kudos that you have given me and this fic from the getgo. It really has meant so much to me, I truly appreciate it!
> 
> Thank you again for reading :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoy the new chapter, and thank you again for dropping by :)
> 
> Note: I did a very basic edit of this, and I'll give it another once over in the morning. I hope you all like it despite the possible mistakes, since any and all are my own!

If a boot is about to drop just outside of her view, Michelle chooses to ignore it as she carries on living her life. It’s a new experience, to say the least-she’s on alert as much as is needed, but when it comes to her personal life she decides to take a step back and let things proceed as they choose.

It’s unnatural.

Michelle’s not entirely sure that she likes it.

But there is something very comforting in having a personal routine that is unimpeded by her nervousness, her belief that even if things are going well they only are on their way to worsening. It helps that she now finds herself having a routine, an honest to god routine that she follows practically every day.

She gets breakfast with Liz and Betty Brant, an X-Wing tech Michelle knows works on Liz’s ship on occasion. She doesn’t know Brant very well, but she likes her well enough that when Brant starts joining her and Liz at their table she has no real objections to her company. She’s also aware of her general demeanor because Ned has a not-so-secret crush on her, and Ned would never make the mistake of having feelings for someone with a poor attitude. 

On the occasion that Brant does not join them, Michelle and Liz chat and talk about what their day ahead is going to look like. Recently, Michelle has also used these mornings to grill Liz on the new translator she's been spending time with. On the rare occasion that Michelle and Liz get to spend prolonged time together, she finds that that the name "Gwen Stacy" comes up with surprising frequency. It's "Stacy said this" or "Stacy did that", and if Liz isn't seriously interested in this girl, Michelle will eat her favorite mug. But, to be fair, Liz also talks about Peter frequently, and with the same kind of tone. It all makes for a fun little mystery that Michelle tries to get more clues about with every subsequent mention of either Gwen or Peter's name.

So she has breakfast with Liz and Betty, goes about her day and her duties, occasionally has lunch with Liz and Peter, and then has dinner with Peter and Ned. On occasion she walks them through her work, because both of them are genuinely curious about what she does, and Michelle truly enjoys talking people through her process. It is hard sometimes to separate her work from the war unfolding outside the relative safety of their base, so when she can talk about linguistic work as just that, _linguistic work_ , she relishes the opportunity remove the topic even for the shortest bit of time from the militarily-tinged shadow they all live under.

Sometimes Peter talks her through his training sequences, even though the X-Wing jargon still largely escapes her. She still makes a concentrated effort to pay attention, and Michelle feels her understanding of X-Wings slowly but surely expand. Even if sometimes she can only give Peter a blank look because whatever he’s talking about means absolutely nothing to a person so firmly rooted to the ground. 

But even though she doesn’t always get what Ned and Peter go on about, she always feels like she has a place in the conversation. They never close her out simply because she doesn’t get the jargon, and she doesn’t feel the need to dumb herself down in order to be understood. Sometimes conversation can be tricky, but Michelle finds she doesn’t struggle in the company of her friends.

Still, talking is just _really_ not her thing. She doesn’t like repeating herself, doesn’t like to talk more than she feels she should. These anxieties don’t dog every conversation she has, but they sometimes linger in the back of her brain when she opens her mouth. She either speaks or she doesn’t at all-Michelle credits herself as never doing anything by halves. 

But the weeks go on and Michelle finds her spare moments filled with the companionship of people who accept her, silence and all. She may not know Betty well, but she considers her a friend. She may refer to Ned and Peter as “losers”, but out of extreme fondness. And there’s no one she’s closer to than Liz.

The boot may drop eventually, but with friends like hers, Michelle knows she can come out the other side.

-

Michelle finds herself spending more time with Peter, in that he keeps showing up where she is, and she doesn’t feel the need to scare him away. He hangs out with her and Liz in the hangar, she sees him every night at dinner, and sometimes he’ll join her when she walks around the jungle surrounding the base. Usually she prefers the solitude, but on occasion he catches her as she exits through the hangar, and on occasion she asks him if he’d like to walk with her. She told Liz she can be friendly, even if this friendship with Peter crept up unexpectedly, and continues to blindside her at every twist and turn.

Just because she considers him a friend, and his presence in her daily routine continues, doesn’t mean that Michelle ever forgets that their lives are always in an extremely tenuous position. Either of them could be reposted at the drop of a hat, so Michelle admits to herself that she also doesn’t mind spending time with him because she can never guarantee just how much time they _actually have_.

So she’s always slightly confused by his constant presence in her life, if she’s being honest.

She may also enjoy his company, but that is neither here nor there.

Over dinner one night they debate the merits of an old holovid they both remember watching growing up, and Michelle delights in telling Peter to his face that his opinion is so wrong, she doesn’t have to actually do any work to prove her point. Ned knows the best course of action is to back her up, and as a team they slowly and joyfully pick apart every single objection that Peter has against their argument. Nevermind that Ned’s never seen the holovid- _he just knows, take **that** Peter_ , that Michelle is right. She revels, loudly and smugly, in the victory.

Others might find her personality prickly, but Peter always laughs off her friendly insults with good humour, and isn’t afraid to push back. Michelle comes to the realization, after several weeks of actively interacting with Peter, that she really likes talking to him.

It’s weird.

Very weird.

Because although he keeps showing up when she and Liz are hanging out, Peter hangs out with her even when Liz isn’t around. And Peter likes Liz- _really_ likes Liz. His eyes always widen ever so slightly when she passes by, and Michelle has heard Peter whisper to Leeds about her plenty of times. Whenever Michelle’s hanging out with both Peter and Liz she feels this bristling feeling under her skin that tells her to back away and leave them to it, but it’s not because of their behavior. They always make sure to include her in their conversations, but it still feels like there is this emotional buffer surrounding the two of them. She may be friends with Peter, but friendship and its emotions don’t come even close to the intensity of romantic feelings.

It all comes to a head one day at lunch in the canteen, which in Michelle’s opinion is really not the best place for these things to occur.

She knows something is off right away because when she gets to table it is absolutely silent, and both Liz and Peter barely acknowledge her when she sits down. She also had gotten a hint that things are off because two tables down from hers she had passed Eugene, and he had made some very pointed eye contact with her. She hadn’t known what to make of it at the time, but now as she sits next to two incredibly silent people she almost wishes she hadn’t fixed Eugene with her meanest glare. Almost, because it’s still Eugene.

Turning back to the whatever that is currently ensuing between Liz and Peter, she finds that the situation has not grown less awkward in her momentary lapse of attention. Liz and Peter have apparently mutually decided to dial up the tension by acting like two people with a big secret to hide.

Michelle knows something is up when she sees Liz glance up at Peter, and then blush and look away when they make eye contact. Peter also looks similarly bashful, and Michelle’s left in the middle watching something go loudly unsaid. Both Liz and Peter exchange quick glances at random intervals, and Michelle finds herself flicking back and forth between the two of them like she’s watching a very intriguing game of Dejarik. Whatever is going on between the two of them seems to be a private matter, and so the entire lunch passes in extreme silence because Michelle doesn’t know what to say, and Liz and Peter seem inclined to not say anything at all.

She looks down to where Eugene is sitting, and he’s watching the entire situation with unrestrained glee. He meets her eye and raises an eyebrow at her, and Michelle will deny until her dying day that she was ever, _ever_ tempted to go over and talk to him for lack of conversation at her own table. She makes a rude gesture at him, and turns back to her food. 

The rest of their lunch passes by in heavy silence, and the air between Liz and Peter crackles with something Michelle can’t quite identify.

Michelle ignores the situation, and the two of them and their weird antics, as a favor to Liz and Peter.

She also ignores how it rankles something in her. 

She does this as a favor to herself.

-

The next day she eats lunch in Harrington’s office, claiming an overabundance of work that keeps her occupied enough that she can’t walk away from it, even to eat. Harrington accepts her reasoning with little resistance, and Michelle figures he either knows she’s lying and doesn’t care, or he’s just that swamped with work he truly does not have the time to argue with her.

They eat their lunch in silence, but it’s not awkward because they have work that needs to be done. After she returns their trays to the canteen she asks to spend the next few hours there in order to continue her work, and Harrington accepts her request. Michelle spends the entire afternoon working in the silence of Harrington's office, with only the occasional interruption of her fellow translators walking in. At one point Stacy walks in, and Michelle watches her out of the corner of her eye, looking for any signs that news regarding Liz and Peter has reached her. She gets absolutely nothing out of Stacy, except for the vague impression that she's pleased. About what, Michelle has absolutely no idea. From their limited interactions Michelle knows that Gwen Stacy is a very kind, intelligent person, so Liz definitely has a type. Because Peter is exactly the same, only paired with the barely constrained need to be in the air at all times. At this point it's all conjecture, but Michelle's observation skills are buzzing due to all the clues she's been presented with. Even if Liz and Peter won't say anything, Michelle is starting to put together the pieces. And if what she suspects is true, Michelle hopes that the news won't hurt Stacy too much, or even at all. 

The hours pass, and when Michelle notes that it's time to turn in, she packs up her stuff and makes to exit. She thanks Harrington, but learns that Harrington saw right through her lie from the very beginning, because as she walks out of his office he calls out after her, “Thanks again for the work today, but while I appreciate your company Jones, I don’t want you to hide out here forever!”

She ducks back into the office in order to give him a look, but Harrington gives as good as he gets. The look he gives her is no nonsense, and Michelle rolls her eyes but concedes that he’s right. She can’t use his office as a means to hide from things, because not only would that be unfair to Harrington, it also means that she’s a grownup, but not grown up enough to face her problems. Confrontation about personal matters, especially when those personal matters involve her friends, makes her palms itch because she has to fight against her instincts. Her instincts that are currently yelling at her to turn tail and run back into Harrington’s office, and wait out the awkwardness until it all blows over.  
Michelle knows that she can’t listen to her instincts right now, but she’ll be damned if she’s not tempted to act on them. 

She walks down the hallway towards her bunk, and hopefully a spare ration bar, Michelle resolves herself to the inevitable conversations that she’ll be having tomorrow. It’ll be awkward, but Michelle knows that feeling awkward is better than being ignorant.

-

The next day at lunch she almost yearns for Harrington’s office when she plops down across from Peter, and he immediately throws out a dozen questions about her absence yesterday. She brushes them all off with the same excuse she gave Harrington, but Peter is dogged in his pursuit of getting the real answer from her. It’s question after question, and finally Michelle snaps.

“Did you honestly expect me to eat lunch with you and Liz after what happened two days ago? Do you honestly believe I would sit through another lunch with you two, when you clearly didn’t want me there in the first place?” Michelle lets her irritation cut through her words, because she finally admits to herself that it had _hurt_. Being ignored by her two closest friends, kept in the dark because they can’t seem to find the need to use their words. She’s an outsider by habit and by preference, but to be placed there without knowing why hurts more than she’s willing to admit. Peter and Liz had cut her out, and the fact that Peter is either unaware or unwilling to discuss it irritates her.

“Of course we wanted you there!” He checks himself, and amends his statement. “I mean, yes, we wanted you there, it’s just…” He stops, and the crease between his brows deepens to the point where it looks like a permanent feature. “I don’t know how to talk about this, because it really is Liz’s thing to say. Just-” he breathes deeply, and looks her squarely in the eye-”We should have told you about what happened. See, the thing you should know is-”

Michelle has very little evidence to go off of, but the way Peter’s talking and the way they were acting pretty much confirms he and Liz are seeing each other. It’ll be weird, but Michelle figures it won’t be the worst thing to ever happen. All she needs is Peter’s actual confirmation, and then they can can move on from this awkwardness.

“I know that you and Liz are dating.” 

“Yeah, an-wait? What?!” 

_What_.

“Hang on-you and Liz _aren’t_ dating?” Well, there goes Michelle’s belief in the power of her deducing abilities. She looks at Peter to find him essentially malfunctioning, his ears a bright red as his expressions flicker from shock to confusion back to shock. 

She’s literally stunned him into silence.

“So all that silence, all those glances, all of it was not because you guys wanted to keep your relationship a secret? What the hell, Parker?” Seriously, what is going on? Their behavior makes no sense now because of this-the relationship idea wasn’t the most plausible idea in the world, but at least it made their behavior somewhat comprehensible. Now, she’s almost as lost in this conversation as Peter is.

"I-I... no?" Peter takes a deep breath, and visibly tries to get a hold on his emotions. "No, Liz and I are not dating. Was it something we said, or did that gave you that impression?"

"It was the fact that you two ignored me for an entire lunch. It was like I wasn't even there."

"Oh god," and Peter's eyes widen to an almost comical degree. He looks lost for words, so Michelle goes ahead and fills the silence.

“It just really hurt that you guys cut me out like that, because you both ignored me without telling me _why_. I know I don’t have that much experience when it comes to friends, but I do know that friends don’t usually do that.” She pauses to take a deep breath, the tension easing out of her slowly but surely. “But, I also know that it wasn’t malicious. It's something personal between you and Liz, and I respect that." She gives him look. "But a little clarity would also have been very much appreciated."

The crease is still there, and a look of contriteness comes to rest on Peter's face. “I swear, half the time we talk I’m apologizing for being an idiot." He gives a self-deprecating laugh. "But I am sorry for being oblivious, especially when it came to your feelings. I'm sorry that we hurt you, I really am.”

Michelle gives him a small smile. "Apology accepted."

Peter smiles back. 

They eat in pleasant silence for a few minutes, before the part of Michelle's brain that's been niggling for more information finally wins out. "Can you really tell me nothing about what made you and Liz act like that?" She knows it's something interesting, and while Michelle never believes herself to be a gossip, she knows she won't stop thinking about it till she gets a solid answer.

"Well, Liz did say I could tell you if you asked. I just didn't want to talk about something I felt really wasn't my thing to say."

"Well, now you just sound incredibly dramatic. What is it? Liz caught you sleeping in your X-Wing? Did she see you naked? Were you having a bad hair day? Anything remotely embarrassing and/or something I could use as blackmail?"

Peter chuckles before shaking his head. “It's a lot simpler: I realized I didn’t have a chance with Liz, and that at the end of the day I much preferred being her friend.”

“Really?” That's it? She rejected him?

“Yeah.” He gives a small shrug. “And I caught her making out with Stacy when I walked into a supply closet looking for some spare oil rags. Figured I should cut my losses, and keep our friendship intact.” _Oh_. The smile he gives her isn't bitter, as though the disappointment of having his all-consuming crush come crashing to halt isn’t upsetting him in the slightest. Knowing Peter, it probably hasn't. He's respectful, and he also doesn't strike Michelle as someone who gets upset when things don't work out in his favor. He's a good guy, and his attitude now is a nice confirmation of that.

Then Michelle processes the rest of that sentence, and her mind kind of explodes because _oh my god_. _Go Liz_. Michelle makes a note to high five her the next time they cross paths, which will then be followed by an intense question and answer session in the privacy of their bunk. Because hello-Liz had a thing for Gwen Stacy for _weeks_ , and all of a sudden she’s making out with her? And Michelle was unaware of this development?

That’s rude as hell. Not really, but Michelle has friend privileges that have been callously ignored by Liz. Privileges that include _letting-Michelle-know-when-you-make-out-with-the-girl-of-your-dreams_. 

She hums in acknowledgement to hide her shock, before her brain helpfully reminds her of a situation she found herself in a few days ago. A situation that now makes a good deal more sense.

“Wait, so lunch was awkward because you caught her making out with Stacy?”

“Right on the money. I could barely meet her eye, and I honestly have no clue how we got through that lunch.” He does that thing again where he ducks his head and scratches the back of his neck, and Michelle can’t keep herself from laughing at just how absolutely ridiculous the whole situation is. She thinks Liz and Peter are on the verge of a relationship, despite Liz’s crush on Stacy, and then it all turns out to be sheer embarrassment that made two grown adults physically unable to clarify the situation. All that rankling she’d felt at lunch-all that because of _embarrassed silence_. 

“Nice to know the real story now.”

Peter hums in agreement.

“But just so you guys know”-and Peter blanches when she says that-”I’m going to be needing some kind of compensation for what the two of you put me through.”

Peter smiles. “Thought you might say something along those lines.”

“I mean, how old are we? You two could barely make eye contact with anyone else besides your food, and I almost had to resort to conversation with Eugene. Even though he was sitting two tables down.”

She leans in to emphasize the truly insulting nature of it all. “ **Eugene**.”

“How you suffered. And at our hands? How can we ever repay you?” He looks at her with mock apprehension.

Michelle raises her eyebrow in mock haughtiness. 

“Give me your rice pudding, and I’ll let it slide.”

Peter throws his head back and laughs, willingly hands over his rice pudding, and the tension breaks from where it’s been hanging over them. When he makes eye contact with her again, something sparking in his eyes, there's a jolt up Michelle’s spine.

She ignores this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am here I am here I am here! Hello! It's only been two weeks, but on my end it has felt like an age has come and gone. I'm grateful for all the kind words I've gotten in the interim, and another thank you to all that have dropped by this fic and given it some love!
> 
> As always, comments are appreciated though never required. Thank you for reading :)
> 
> And a special thanks to [13ee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/13ee/pseuds/13ee) for answering my questions, and for helping me make my writing the best it can be!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz and Michelle have a little nighttime chat, and Michelle reflects on the pure goodness that is Liz Allan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As per usual, any and all mistakes are my own!

Michelle wakes up one morning to see Liz sneaking in, the dark of their room not enough to hide the scurrying figure of Liz as she tries to sneak past Michelle. Michelle glances over to her chrono to see that it’s just barely past sunrise, and that if she remembers correctly, she never actually heard Liz come in last night. Usually she stays up and waits for Liz, but last night she had been so exhausted that she’d conked out as soon as her head hit the pillow. She’s wide awake now, but Liz doesn’t seem to have realized.

“Ehem.”

Liz visibly jumps several inches in the air, and emits a high squeal as she wheels around to face Michelle. The red on her cheeks is visible even in the dark, but whether it’s from embarrassment or the cold outside, Michelle isn’t sure.

“Young lady-”

“Oh don’t you da-”

“Do you have any idea what time of night this is?” Michelle bursts into some serious giggles, her amusement unable to be restrained any longer when she catches the look on Liz’s face. “Your father and I have been worried sick-we stayed up all night fretting!”

R4 trills in agreement, their lights flickering from their corner in admonishment.

“Yeah, you waking up is really showing me just how concerned you are. I’m amazed you two didn’t have a search party scouring the base looking for me, seeking justice in my name.” Liz's sarcasm is undercut by the massive smile on her face, one that gets even bigger when R4 beeps out further admonishments and rolls over to gently knock Liz's leg. She pats their head, and the astromech makes the noise equivalent of "fine, I won't stay mad" before turning and rolling back to its charging station. 

Liz glances over at Michelle. "You two stay up all night in the pursuit of justice?" There's a hint of concern in her voice, concern that largely has to do with the possibility that Michelle didn't catch a good night of sleep. She fixes a look at Michelle that makes her point very clear- _tell me you got enough sleep_.

“Justice never sleeps.” Michelle tilts her head and concedes the point. “But sometimes I do.” 

“I’m glad, you’ve been wearing yourself thin these past few weeks.” There's relief there, but Liz’s sad smile immediately brings down the mood of the conversation. If that sentence came from anyone else, Michelle would be irritated by what she took to be misplaced pity. But Liz speaks the truth with such ease Michelle feels her hackles ease with little to no fight. The past few weeks have been so busy, especially since Harrington has a new recruit shadowing her during the day, that Michelle’s free time has straight up evaporated. At every single meal she’s had to bring work so as to keep on top of it, and her walks in the jungle have been curtailed in order to spend more time at her desk in Harrington's office. 

But it’s not just her-everyone working under Harrington has spent their time these last few weeks looking more at flimsi sheets than their friends and family. Michelle typically gets to her table before her friends, and at each meal she raises her head in greeting before diving back into her translation. All her friends have taken the change graciously, not prying her for conversation in order to escape her silence. Both Peter and Ned stumbled the first few days, each unconsciously trying to involve her in the conversation before they got the hang of leaving her alone. If Michelle’s being completely honest, she half expected them to move to another table so as to avoid her silence. But they stay, seemingly preferring her silent companionship over not sitting next to her at all.

Liz is the same way. Liz also keeps small tabs on Michelle, shown in the fact that twice each day she drops by Harrington’s office in order to drop off snacks for Michelle and her fellow translators. And to stop and chat to Gwen. They’re so adorable Michelle makes a point of making immature gagging noises when they hug goodbye. This is typically greeted with a very rude gesture from Liz, and a blushing Gwen ducking her head to try and hide her red, red cheeks. Seeing her best friend so happy is always one of the highlights of Michelle’s day. And the fact that Liz takes the time out of her schedule to drop by and say hi makes Michelle’s heart hurt in the way that only overwhelming affection can. 

Whether it’s through dropping off snacks, sending Michelle a “you’re doing great!” message over her comm, or just staying up at night to talk about their days, Liz shows that she cares in small ways that nevertheless knock the wind out of Michelle because of the tenderness they show. 

Michelle’s mom was the same way, expressing love simply by showing she cared, and Michelle blinks away tears as she comes back to reality. Liz is looking at her with kind eyes, but she doesn't pry into what has made Michelle go a bit bleary eyed. 

"Thanks."

Liz waves away her thanks with a gentle nonchalance, knowing that lingering on Michelle's tearful mood won't clear the air. "Don't mention it."

"So," Michelle clears her throat and plows through the somber mood. "Just what were you and Gwen doing that kept you out so late?"

“We had a picnic dinner out in the jungle, and then fell asleep under the stars, if you must know.”

“You disgust me.”

Liz laughs and blows her a kiss as she makes her way to the bathroom. The heavy mood breaks in an instant, and Michelle's offers up a silent thanks that she and Liz can navigate emotionally fraught moments so easily. She also sends up thanks to whatever force it was that brought Liz into her life, and feels the tension in her shoulders ebb away at the knowledge that she'll fall back asleep in a good mood. Michelle flops back onto her pillow, and pulls her sheets over her head as she tries to catch a few more hours of sleep before her shift starts. R4 chirps from the corner, and Michelle pushes the sheets down in order to properly look at the astromech.

"I know, bud. I'm happy she's happy, too." R4 makes a pleased whirring sound before powering down, and Michelle pulls the sheets back up over her head and closes her eyes. Sleep is gently edging at her mind, and Michelle eases into her bed as a dreamy weightlessness takes over and pulls her under. She's asleep within minutes.

But not before she hears Liz brightly humming in the sonic. 

Michelle falls back asleep with a smile on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A quick little update before things become a little more hectic! I head back to school this upcoming Friday, so I'm not entirely sure when the next update will be. I just wanted to thank you all for being so patient with my inconsistent updates, and for coming back and reading this story. I hope to be back as soon as I can!
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> As always, comments are appreciated, though never required.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As per usual, any and all mistakes are my own.
> 
> Hope you enjoy, and thank you for reading!

The order comes in during the afternoon, when Michelle and Liz are both out in the hangar working. Michelle’s parked on top of Liz’s X-Wing as Liz works on the underbelly of the ship. The blaster marks scorching the bottom have come from Liz’s latest mission, and judging by the silence that Liz has responded with to the questions regarding just how narrow her escape from FO territory had been, Michelle knows with absolute certainty that she had come very close to losing her best friend. The truth of that statement chills her blood even days after Liz had piloted her battered X-Wing back into the hangar.

Echoes of past events rattle around with each step she takes around Liz and her ship, but Michelle ignores it all because she can’t do her job properly if she’s mired in memory. She swipes rather harshly at a nasty looking scorch mark, but otherwise remains calm and collected as she assesses the damage to the **_Padmé_**. Both she and Gwen have puttered around the ship as Liz goes from meeting to meeting, sharing the information she’s collected with the higher ups. Whatever she found was important, and secret. At night Liz does not say what she found on her scouting trip, and Michelle does not ask. 

It seems strange that as this undercurrent surges through the base following Liz’s news, Michelle’s work drops off. The FO has either changed up their tactics, or gone silent in preparation for something big. Whatever it is, it means that Michelle has more free time than she knows what to do with. So she finds tasks around the base that keep her occupied.

She paints as Liz works on the engine, both of them finding the silence easier to bear than talking. Talking would only lead to crying, and neither of them wants to break down in the middle of the hangar. They have to be professional, despite the war that constantly brings chaos to their doorstep. 

It’s as she’s touching up a constellation near the the nozzle of the ship that her comm pings. She and Liz look at each other before her hand slowly lowers to her belt. It’s been two standard weeks since Liz got back, and Michelle’s skin is beginning to crawl with all the waiting around she’s had to do. Now that this ping means something is headed her way, Michelle is not sure she wants to find out what it is.

An unknown voice responds when Michelle answers, and tells her to report to Harrington’s office as soon as she can. The voice also tells her to bring Liz, and the silence between them is tense once the voice disconnects. Liz’s tools clang in the hull as she hurriedly wipes fuel residue off her cheeks, and Michelle’s paintsticks are abandoned as she and Liz start walking briskly towards the exit.

Michelle’s so focused on the way out of the hangar that she almost doesn't notice Peter waving hello as he walks by. She nods in polite greeting, but misses the concerned look he gives her back as she and Liz walk away.

-

“We have utmost confidence that with you and Allan on this mission, we will be able to trace the source of the supply line and act accordingly.” And here is where the professionalism of General Potts fades, replaced instead by the more genuine woman Michelle knows is there. “Good luck, and may the Force be with you.” The holo cuts out, and Liz and Michelle stand there in shocked silence as they wait for the people in the room to start speaking. There’s no less than three generals in the room, plus Harrington and Admiral Sefla, and the air is so heavy Michelle feels like she’s minutes away from choking.

Fortunately, Liz breaks the silence. “When do we leave?” She addresses this question to Sefla, as he is the person on base they have to report back to, and are directed by for this mission. He straightens before informing them of their departure time, that very evening, and the expected duration of the mission. Both Liz and Michelle are being sent to a dusty and, once assumed, forgotten planet on the edge of what used to be Hutt Space. The planet was uninhabited after the Hutts were cleared out, but Liz’s previous scouting mission had heard of rumblings in that corner of the galaxy. Once they're out there they’ll be cut off from all communication, with only an emergency rendezvous destination as their sole means of contacting base during the operation. 

Michelle’s terrified. She’s never been sent out on a mission, and although Liz’s success on past missions has made her one of the most respected spies on base, Michelle knows with full certainty that her skills are barely a tenth of what Liz has. The last thing she wants to do on her first mission is muck it up, but when Sefla turns towards her she finds that her anxieties are not the shared sentiment of the room.

“Harrington has recommended you as his best translator,” Sefla tells Michelle, and Michelle warms at the compliment. She knows she’s good at what she does, but to hear from an _Admiral_ no less that her superior thinks her skills are worthy of this mission takes the edge off her fear. If Harrington can place his full confidence in her, despite her lack of time in the field, then she knows her own confidence is not misplaced. Turning to Harrington, she reciprocates the small smile he gives her. Almost without realizing it, her spine straightens as he shoulders roll back. Michelle settles at her full height, and sweeps her gaze across the room. 

These people are depending on her and Liz, and for the love of all that is good, Michelle will not let them down.

“Infiltrating a potential FO outpost in order to figure out where they’re setting up supply lines and outposts?” Michelle’s smile is sharp and determined. “Bring it on.”

-

When the meeting wraps shortly after, Liz and Michelle stop by the hangar to clean up their supplies before heading to their room. Liz, as to be expected, packs quickly and efficiently, and heads out in order to say goodbye to Gwen. Michelle waves her out of the room with a warning not to be too gross, and Liz flips her a rude hand gesture before smiling and heading out to find her girlfriend. 

Michelle finishes packing shortly after Liz leaves, and plops her duffel next to Liz’s by the door. Her bag is a little lumpy, which is to be expected, considering that Michelle’s idea of packing starts off as “check-climate-of-destination-and-roll-clothes-in-order-to-maximize-space”, and typically devolves into “eh-this-should-work” and “organization?-never-heard-of-her.” But she’s packed, and Liz can roll her eyes as much as she wants because Michelle is prepared for any kind of weather.

“So _ha_.” She mumbles under her breath as she puts her pencils and sheets of flimsi in her knapsack. She throws in some spare datasticks, because she knows that they can’t be over prepared for a mission like this. They will either come back with next to nothing, or with such an inundation of information that Michelle won’t stop working for weeks. 

_No pressure_.

She finishes getting her supplies stored, and settles in to wait for Liz to get back. The plan is to swing by the canteen for some food, and after a quick dinner they’ll be off. On Michelle’s first mission.

She’s fine.

Totally fine, everything is being handled super well.

Michelle is amazed at how well she’s handling her nerves.

And she totally does not jump when someone knocks on her door.

Or yelp. Michelle Jones does not _yelp_.

Or maybe she does, because she opens to door to Ned barely containing a smile. She fixes her coldest look at him, but the heat isn’t there, and he knows it.

“‘Sup Leeds?” 

“Rumor has it that you and Liz are heading out on a mission tonight, so I wanted to stop by and say goodbye.” He pauses when he sees the look on her face. “Unless… that’s a bad thing?”

“No, no! It’s not, it’s just,” _she will not choke up, she will not choke up_ , “That’s really sweet of you. You didn’t have to come all the way here to say goodbye, but I’m not going to complain about it.” They look at each other for a few seconds, and then Michelle smiles and flings her arms around Ned in an enthusiastic hug. She can feel his hesitation at this overly demonstrative display of affection from her, but then his arms circle around her and Michelle finds that she doesn’t care about being seen showing strong emotions in the middle of the hallway.

They squeeze each other for a few more moments before the hug comes to an end, and they step back to give each other one last smile before Ned departs and Michelle goes back to her bed to wait for Liz.

She only has to putz around for a little while before Liz gets back, and then they’re off to the canteen. They run into Betty there, and idly chat as they eat dinner. What they talk about isn’t really important-what’s important is the company, because Michelle knows this is how Betty prefers to express affection. She won’t come right out and say how much she’ll miss them, and instead her seeking them out for dinner expresses her emotions without the need for words. They know that she cares for them, so there are no need for words. Michelle figures this is why Ned likes her so much, that sweetness and confidence they both possess in spades.

Once they finish eating there is nothing left to do besides hug Betty and walk towards the hangar. 

Everything should be fine, except one thing that nags at Michelle.

Peter never dropped by to say goodbye.

Michelle tries not to let that bother her as they walk towards the U-Wing they’ll be using. But it does, it really does bug her. She’s pretty sure Liz knows why she’s quiet, but Liz kindly chooses not to say anything about it as they stash their gear in the hold and Liz begins pre-flight checks. Michelle ventures out in order to get a better look at the ship they’ll be using. It’s fairly plain-grey with blue stripes racing down the sides. No Gigorans, no constellations. It’s such an unassuming ship Michelle wonders if its never been flown before; no personality is present on the inside or the outside. 

It’s as she examines the outside of the craft that she hears a series of exclamations and bangs behind her, like something is crashing through the hangar at top speed. Probably R4 racing towards the ship-they’d dropped it by the techs in order for it to get some much needed upgrades before the mission. It knew to meet them in the hangar, and it’s on time, but it’s a tad dramatic. Running into people and objects is very much in its wheelhouse.

“Wait-” and she knows that voice, the smile that comes to her face an unconscious choice “-Michelle, wait!” She turns to find Peter full on sprinting towards the ship, a mixture of happiness and despair playing across his face. He skids to a halt right before her, and she’s struck by the deep breaths he’s pulling in. It’s like he’s just sprinted across the entire base to get here.

“Sorry, I just sprinted across the entire base to get here.”

_Oh_.

“I was out doing training sequences all day, and when I got back to our room Ned told me you guys were heading out. And I-” He gulps, and Michelle doesn’t know if he’s still struggling for breath, or dealing with something else she can’t decipher. “I didn’t want you to leave without saying goodbye.”

She doesn’t say anything for a few moments, unsure as to what to say about this. He just ran across _the entire base_ to say goodbye-her heart rattles around behind her ribs, and she squashes the fluttery feeling as she feels her cheeks heat up. Most of the words rolling around in her mind don’t feel right, and even if she was to say them Michelle knows they’ll get lost in the space between her brain and her mouth.

So she keeps it plain and simple. Michelle has never been much of a hugger, but today seems to be the day that changes.

She takes a step forward and hugs Peter with all her might. He immediately hugs her back, and she mumbles her thanks into his shoulder. He huffs a laugh, and the heat of his breath ghosts across her neck in a way that makes her heart jump for reasons she will **not** read into at the present moment. When they step back she feels his hands slide from her back and across her waist, and once they’re dangling at his sides she finds she wants his warmth back. Peter just radiates heat and happiness, and Michelle will miss it once she’s out in the cold black of space. 

Peter goes to say something, but he’s interrupted simultaneously by the arrival of R4 and Liz hopping out of the ship. He ducks his head and rubs the back of his neck, and whatever he was going to say is lost in the last minute goodbyes he gives Liz and R4.

Michelle hugs him one last time before turning and climbing back aboard. Just as she’s about to slide the door closed, Michelle looks up to find Peter gazing at her. Her skin heats up, but she doesn’t look away. She keeps eye contact with him until the door closes, and even then she stares forward as though she can still see him through the metal. Coming back to herself, she takes a deep breath before going to join Liz in the cockpit. Something in her jacket pocket clangs against the metal of her seatbelt when she plops down in her seat, but she can’t figure out what it is just yet as Liz has started to communicate with flight control.

Michelle grips the controls in front of her, and as they exit the hangar, then the base, and finally clear the atmosphere, she relaxes back into her seat. It's quiet as Liz flips some switches and guides them away from the planet.

They enter hyperspace, and Michelle finally understands the joy that Liz and Peter feel when they fly. 

Watching stars streak past, she feels alive and powerful.

She feels _free_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... hi.
> 
> it's safe to say senior year of college firmly took control of my life, and unfortunately that meant I had to put this story aside to focus on school. just know I never forget this story, or the people who wrote such kind things. I really, truly appreciate the encouragement that was written even after I disappeared for four months. I hope this chapter is satisfying for you all, and although I cannot say when the next one will be posted, just know I will continue to work on this story.
> 
> thank you again for reading!
> 
> and, as always, comments are appreciated, though never required.


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